Project Fear 🙀️

Jul 14, 2022 project agile jenkins

This could be told as an epic tale of consultancy derring do in the Tolkien style, only with less bad verse, fewer elves, and a minimum of talking trees. But life is short. Here is the précis of a project for a vast multinational that demonstrates that the forces of evil are nothing when compared with the forces of bureacracy and incompetence. Bullet points are better than talking trees, right precious?

By far the worst professional shitshow I’ve ever seen and I often think of it. Especially the “Jenkins” gag.

How did it get so bad?

I think the fundamental issues were these:

I’ve probably forgotten a few other things about it, and it was a good few years ago now, but … even when the compiler is fighting me and the Heisenbugs are flocking to the light - I can look back and remember those worse times. Things never seem too bad then. Also these days I avoid any project where I won’t be in a position to help steer things before they can go that superluminally off-track.

So. What’s your worst project?


Update: I submitted this post to Hacker News where it got a bit of traction: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=32106441.

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